Plenty of Time
I tried to get my boys to watch the Justin Bieber movie. They're 11, 10, and 5. The 5-year-old was totally interested, but that's only because it has the song from Karate Kid in it. And what I was going for, of course, was the part where you get inspiration to follow your dreams and also to understand that people with that kind of success get there because they work really hard at it. The thing is, they believed me - that they would get that out of it - but they had to get to football practice.
For a full day at least I wondered if I was doing everything I could to help them figure out what they're supposed to be so they can begin to work toward it. Drew likes art. He even emailed my brother-in-law recently asking Ryan to be his agent. Drew's going to run his artwork through Ryan and give him a percent of the cut when he sells the finished products to his friends. So he's set I guess. I won't worry about him.
John's still thinking the NFL, and as previously mentioned there's not much I can do to help him there. Around this time, we had to choose an instrument for him for beginning band. You can imagine the weight I put on this decision. Which instrument would best set him up for a career in music if that's where he was called? What if I chose the wrong one and ruined everything before it began? (What if I couldn't AFFORD the right one, because oh my gosh and seriously they should include in the letter to fifth graders, "Do you want to take band next year, and also please inform your parents that this will cost them hundreds of dollars. Just FYI. Don't let it stop you or anything, but seriously. You've been warned.")
So there I am, panicking about whether or not I was helping them focus enough, whether I was doing enough to introduce music into their sports-centered world - just in case - and then John came home beaming. He'd gotten the second best time in his class that day for the mile. More importantly, he'd well over-reached his personal goal. He'd been talking about it for days - the mile's coming up... I hope I do okay... I hope I get under last time... I hope I get this. I was too busy worrying about his calling to hear how hard he was making goals on his own and pursuing them. And then he'd reached it. And to top it off, he loves band.
I feel really behind sometimes on my own goals. It took me forever even to set them. And I think I was trying to keep them from making the same mistake. Thank God they ignored me - heard me, gave Bieber a chance and all - but basically just kept moving forward. It IS the Yearbook Years after all. They're supposed to diversify.
The other day I heard this quote: All the interesting people I've met had NO idea what they wanted to do when they were twenty. I bet that's even more true for Eleven, Ten, and Five.
I feel much better now.