the status of my Alpine path
Well, it's time to get to work. Throughout January, I vegged. I mean, I really vegged. I didn't even read that much in January. Before the holidays, I pushed so hard to get my novel to a point that I wasn't embarrassed to show it to someone, and once I sent it off to that someone, I set aside the dream.
I mean, that's sort of what I did. I didn't set it aside forever, but I definitely let it go for a while. It's hard work having a life and a job and another job and more life, and to still pursue a dream. So I think in January I decided to just remember how perfectly content I am with just Being Mama and Wife and Admirer of All the Great Books and Movies Other People Have Worked For.
And if January was step-back-and-chill month then the beginning of February began as the month in which to consider going insane. I didn't like the status quo after all. Not when it came to the work I do. But would I ever get a chance to make creating stuff a real live, authorized part of my day? I really hoped so.
Now, the brilliant Holly has read my novel and given me stellar advice for improving it. And I'm back. I couldn't chill now if I tried. And I don't feel nearly so insane. And I have an actual assignment to get me moving.
So if you see a new blog design pop up in the next week or two, it's not that I'm procrastinating. If Jake is dressed as a different super hero or movie character every time you see us, don't worry that turning them right side out has kept me from revising. And if I can tell you exactly what's happening on LOST and American Idol and pass any quiz backwards and forwards from either Little House on the Prairie Season Six or a number of chick flicks from my cabinet at home, that doesn't mean anything either. I'm working. Working really hard. And someday...there's going to be a novel to show for it.
Then whisper, blossom, in thy sleep
How I may upward climb
The Alpine path, so hard, so steep,
That leads to heights sublime;
How I may reach that far-off goal
Of true and honoured fame,
And write upon its shining scroll
A woman's humble name."
-from "To the Fringed Gentian" as quoted by Lucy Maud Montgomery in her memoir