i'd like to thank the academy

I would first like to thank Scott for kneeling on his sidewalk to tape down the red carpet for our arrival and then posing as the paparazzi who snapped our grand entrance.

Thank you to Michele for the decorations and gifts bags and boas and classy finger foods - chocolate-covered strawberries are good for me, right?

Thank you to Jon Stewart for letting that girl from Once finish her speech after the commercial break before which she was so rudly muted and drowned out by the orchestra.

And although the "Once" people won, thank you to Enchanted for providing almost every other song in that category as it provided for huge, delightful production numbers throughout the evening. Thank you to August Rush as well for the inspirational gospel moment. The song choices and best picture choices seem to have been chosen by different groups - one glass half full, the other really empty.

I am especially grateful to The Bourne Ultimatum as my bets regarding that movie in the sound editing categories might very well have given me the lead on my pre-printed ballot. Which reminds me to thank Michele again, because my prize rocked. And also reminds me to thank Jon Stewart again because after these categories were announced he read my mind by saying, "Someone just took the lead in their office pool based on a guess."

Finally, I would like to thank Hollywood - for the beautiful dresses, the strangely casual up-dos, the montages, montages, montages (good Lord, I love a good movie montage), for putting Jack on one end of the first row and George Clooney on the other as classic Hollywood bookends, and in all other ways with almost no complaints (despite the sad penchant for violence in the nominated films—as Jon put it, "Does this town need a hug or what?"). For in all other ways completely bringing it.

I officially forgive you for the Golden Globes.