a little thought on sameness

So this morning I was putting on my mascara and deliberately closed my mouth. I do the same thing with blush, never smiling as I apply it. And I'm a work-at-home mom who refuses to wear sweat pants or pajama bottoms EVER.

Why do I do these things? In case it's not obvious, the technical reason I do them is to be different, to avoid embodying a cliche. A friend gave me a cartoon once of geese flying in a V, and the last bird in one of the formations was saying, "Geez, I feel like such a conformist." I don't think she gave it to me because I was so very unique but because she could see that I was trying to be.

What is amazing to me is the contradiction of it all. First of all, in this day and age - seriously - trying to stick out in the crowd is exactly what the rest of the crowd is doing. So I'm not sure it's possible to actually stick out in the crowd unless you genuinely do, and that's rarely by deliberate activity.

And more importantly, why do I try so hard to be unique when everything I do as a writer is trying to describe, illustrate, and otherwise completely embrace the little things that make us all the same?

It's just something I was wondering.